Deal with the Brad is the twenty-eighth chapter of Stranger in a Strange School. The title is a reference to the term "Deal with the Devil."
Basil walked to cooking class. Cooking class. Some guy from Xanadu had failed cooking class. How was that even possible? How does someone fail cooking? You make food! It's that simple!
As Basil neared is class and he felt someone grab him by the collar of his shirt. Basil looked at the person who had grabbed him. It wasn't Barrage. It was Brad Von Chilstein. Basil gave a small grin and waved.
"Hey, Brad!" Basil laughed nervously. "It's been a long time… six years."
"You know Basil, we've known each other for a long time. We're practically family!" Basil was trying to keep from shaking. "But after I jokingly push you into a lake you take it personally and get this vendetta against me."
"We were five, I couldn't swim I could have drowned." Brad starred into Basil's eyes. Basil was clearly intimidated. "Besides, no vendetta anymore! I figure since you nearly drowned that karma did the work so we're even."
"Good. Now answer me this. Why didn't you help us find that prank footage Chaz had? Or better yet Chaz himself?" Basil swallowed. Brad starred at him. He starred at him with critical eyes.
"I wasn't there the day of the prank." Basil looked down at his shoes. "So I figured that I shouldn't get involved."
"It was your fear of mob mentality wasn't it?" Basil nodded. "Well, then I guess you know that since Murder's attack yesterday you are at risk of being a victim of mob mentality." Basil nodded again. "Let me tell you this, Basil. You aren't popular you're pitied. Pitied because of that time Murder attacked you. That made you known to the whole school!"
"Really?" Basil stopped looking at his shoes. He looked Brad in the eye with curiosity. "No remembers me from when I knocked down Chaz or when I was selling candles?"
"No, not really." Basil scratched his head, dumbfounded. "But the fact is that Murder attacked the jocks, the emos, the mathletes, Ed the former water boy, and most ironically the birdwatchers. You can't get protection from any of them. Actually, half of the student body is against you because of yesterday." Basil gulped and got down on his knees. "You'd be better of going to the 15th Graders for protection."
"I'm at your mercy!" People stopped in the halls to look. "I beg you! Use your influence to protect me!" Brad looked down at Basil with eyes that were less than happy.
"Get up, Basil, people are stopping to watch." Basil stood up and looked around. There were people watching! Basil's face communicated how he was. He was angry at being starred at. He clenched his fists and looked at the people around him.
"What are you looking at?" Basil yelled at the students starring at him. They all jumped in fright. "Get to class!" Immediately, the students went on their way. Basil then turned to Brad. "Well? How about it?"
"You're making a deal with me?" Brad laughed. Basil starred at Brad. All he was missing was red skin and a pitchfork. "Okay, but the deal goes two ways. I use my influence to protect you and you help me get revenge."
"But to seek revenge may lead to hell!" Brad shook his head. He was not amused by Basil's objection.
"Look, Basil you've made the deal and you never go back on a deal. Understand?" Basil nodded. "Good." Brad and Basil started to walk toward their cooking class. "You know, Basil, we're a lot a like you and I." Basil rolled his eyes and groaned. "That was a compliment, Basil."
"Thank you, Brad." There was uncertainty in Basil's voice. He wasn't even sure about how he was like Brad! "So whom are you getting your revenge on?"
"Him…" Brad pointed at Lee as he entered the cooking class. "And her." Brad pointed at Tina, entering the same class.
"But they're my friends!" Brad frowned at Basil's objection. Basil shook his head. He couldn't hurt his friends… he just couldn't.
"Basil, I'm sure you heard about that little hair incident."
"Well, bleach isn't that bad. I had a friend at my old school who bleached his hair blonde because of how fast it was." Brad hit Basil on the back of the head. Basil flinched in pain.
"Shut up." Basil looked down at the floor. He never imagined that Brad could be like this but if Thursday meant anything, it just showed that Brad could be… different. "Look this is about getting back at them for that public humiliation. I was lucky to get the bleach out the moment I got home. If I didn't we'd both be gawked at!" Basil placed a hand on his face. Were people laughing at him because of his disfigurement? "Look, since accidents happen in cooking class we'll just have something happen."
"I am not going to chop their fingers off with a cleaver!" Brad shook his head. Basil was objecting before he even heard the plan.
"No, you idiot! Not that!" There was a guilty look on Basil's face. Brad didn't understand. Why should Basil feel guilty? "Something that can't be connected to either of us. A cookie dough explosion." Basil, do you understand?" Basil didn't say anything. "Nod if you understand." Basil nodded. "Good. Now, let's get to class"
Once everyone was in cooking class, Basil kept looking at both Lee and Tina. The guilty look on his face was still there. Cam, Holger and Biffy were there. They say the guilty look. They knew something was up. Since when did Basil associate with one of the popular kids… that weren't Lee or Cam? Lee and Tina hadn't noticed. Basil's guilty look and the fact that he kept looking at both Lee and Tina told Cam, Holger and Biffy that something was wrong with their flat cap wearing friend.
A few minutes later, Basil was putting a large mess of cookie dough in an oven. Cam, Biffy and Holger both starred. What the heck was he doing?
"Hey Brad!" Lee and Tina both turned to look at Basil. Did he just call Brad Von Chilstein? Brad walked over to Basil. They were both standing in front of the oven that Basil had put the mess of cookie dough into. "I got my hand glued to the stove." Brad looked at both of Basil's hands. He had his arms crossed.
"You do not, you moron!" Basil laughed. Brad raised an eyebrow and starred at Basil. He was insane! Basil started to walk backwards, keeping his eyes on Brad. He was walking backwards towards the open door.
"Don't ever mess with my friends." Brad starred at the smirk on Basil's face. What was he going on about? "Lee, Tina, a word?" Lee and Tina both starred at each other. What did Basil want to talk about? They both followed him. Basil was standing away from the door, by the lockers.
"Yes, Basil?" Tina could not understand what was going on. Neither could Lee.
"Three, two, one… cookie dough explosion." Lee raised an eyebrow.
"What?" Sure enough an explosion happened. A cookie dough explosion! Lee and Tina looked at Basil with a horrified look. "Basil, what did you just do?" Basil laughed, uncontrollably. The laughter stopped when Brad came out of the classroom, somehow the only person covered in cookie dough.
"You're suicidal, aren't you?" Basil shook his head. "You made a deal with me for me to use my influence to protect you from the wrath of the students that were attacked by Murder and you turn the revenge plan on me? Are you insane?" Basil shook his head. "Then what is going on in your empty head?" Basil walked behind Lee and Tina and pushed them toward Brad. He was clearly intimidated. "Do you still want my protection?" Basil nodded. "Then you obey me, got that, moron?" Basil nodded. "Okay, now help me get this stuff off me, Igor!" At that moment Basil passed out from sheer intimidation. He fell backwards and ended up landing on the Red Tatzelwurm's tail. The Tatzelwurm just continued walking or slithering down the halls, ignoring the pain in its tail. It was at this point that Cam came out of the classroom. Lee and Tina were trying to wake up Basil while Brad was nudging the unconscious form with his foot.
"I get the nurse!"